Shifting from Pain, Exhaustion & Rejection to Resurrection


The pain that pierced my heart was nothing new.

I’ve been swept up in a tidal wave of emotions many, many times before.

Crying myself to sleep from heartbreak that made my heart physically ache, frozen and unable to function in shock of loss and abandonment, going through the motions while processing abuse, wearing the mask of Superwoman strength that no one could see through when I didn’t know what to do with myself but had responsibilities to show up.

I know what it feels like to lose yourself in a relationship, to wait for someones love that never comes, to hit rock bottom physically unable to walk and unable to wash my own hair let alone help myself and do ‘it all’ alone. I’ve gone through feeling emptiness, numbness, disconnect, missing a piece of me, a lack of being enough, sadness turned to anger turned to sadness, the fear of never getting there or not having that illusive desire fulfilled personally, professionally, emotionally, sexually and spiritually…

And I know you’ve been here too. Maybe you’re here today and I’ve written this for you.

Because you may not be seeing your own truth, your invaluable contribution to this earth, the success you have already achieved, the love you are here to receive and radiate, the joy you bring to the lives of those you touch and the miracles you are here to experience…


Love Over Fear

Why I’m sharing this is because the difference now is I am able to catch myself before the painful feelings grow into a tidal wave of emotions. And I don’t want you unnecessarily living in pain, self-persecution, lack and fear any longer when there is another way.

How did I make this shift? Some time ago I committed to choosing Love over Fear, every time, no matter what.

One simple decision that I’ve made over and over again meant that;

*I decided nothing anyone says speaks more truth than what my own heart and soul speaks (when I create the stillness and silence to listen).

*That nothing is what it first may seem when the ego reacts.

*That the pain of doors closing, relationships ending, rejection’s and ‘no’s from people I reached out to, do not define me. None of these happenings has any power to hold me back or stop me from shining my light if I don’t let them. And the same goes for you.


If you want to hear me share a personal experience of this tune into this link:

Ego V Soul: An Invitation to Your Heart



To start with I surrendered to the initial shock of pain, heartache or disappointment by knowing ‘this’ experience is not what it seems. That this ‘big deal’ is not so big at all. That I am still the Divine Love I have always been. That as long as I honour and speak my truth, coming from this authentic place in my thoughts, words and actions, that the pain will allow my  ‘breaking down’ to guide me to ‘breaking through’. And this can happen faster and faster each time with the shock not being any more than a slightly stronger wind blowing through your leave and branches, unable to shake your strong trunk which is deeply rooted, grounded and connected to mother earth and your truth.

The cracks in my heart just like the cracks in your heart will let you shine brighter with more compassion, loving kindness, non-judgment, wisdom of heart and deep knowing of the collective human experience. Surrender can lift the veil on the illusions you and I create and hold ourselves captive by. As The Beatles famously wrote and one heartbreaker / life teacher once told me “let it be”. This is surrender. Do not fight tidal waves. Flow with them like water. Bend like the strong oak tree you are. Not attached to an outcome, not fazed. You and I after all signed up to this school of life. The place of continual learning and growing. This is part of the mandatory soul course you’re taking. It’s only a matter of your choosing; when you commit to doing the work to raise your vibes of consciousness and stop fighting a battle that only exists in your mind if you buy into it.

For deeper guidance here enjoy reading: 7 Mystical Truths for Traveling the Sacred Path



Born Again

How do I get there?  I hear you ask.

Perhaps you’ve navigated your way through heartbreaks, emotional exhaustion, physical pain and rejections before but this time it’s got you in a firm grip. I’m going to be straight up honest with you here. That grip you feel is self-imposed. It’s not his fault, or her fault, not the weather or the moon, nor your zodiac sign. It is your ego. Your ego personality is hitting the repeat button with your negative, fearful thoughts perpetuating the drama of emotions you are feeling. This part of you enjoys feeding itself off your thoughts. And you know this is easier than stepping out of the victim, inner child, soul prostitute or self sabotage mode that you are functioning in. These inner archetypes, thriving off your ego, are convincing you that the ‘story’ you have told yourself is true. This is a lie. A manipulation. A magician’s illusive slide of hand to distract you and keep you looking in one direction when your soul is calling out for you to see with clarity into the other direction. Your soul, your truth, your Divine self is never separate from that which you truly crave which is unconditional love. That is eternal and abundant and always on offer to you if only you open your eyes, mind, heart and entire being to grant it to yourself.

How can you shake up this mental programming of the dramatic ‘story’ of lack and fear you are swimming in and start to tap into your heart, soul and the power of Divine Spirit which is within you?


Here are some simple kick-starters for you;


Change Your Space

Leave the desk, your bed, the room, your routine and get some fresh air. Go bare foot, get into nature even if it is on the balcony, in your garden or the local park. Get out of your headspace by changing the space you are in.


Chi Charge

Chi or Prana is your life force energy. You charge this by bringing it into the body temple through;

Clean water,

Nourishing foods fresh from the earth,


Deep full bely breathing.


Invest in these four essentials. I suggest starting with 10 deep breathes right now.


Play the Beats

Line up a few tracks, crank the volume and hit play as you freestyle dance around your space. This helps raise the vibration within and around you.

My go to’s are 80’s Madonna, Alicia Keys,  Katie Perry, Taylor Swift & Lady Gaga,

Purely to shake up your usual mind set with amped up, fast paced, positive and powerful inspo’ lyrics and tunes. May I add doing this while you sing and dance however you feel. Find which songs resonate  and let Shakti flow through you.

This can also work on your iPod while you’re going for a walk or jog, in the car, or headphones at your desk if nothing else. Though ideally you are in a space where you can LET IT OUT by letting yourself go for it.

*Especially if you read this and feel resistance. That’s your ego going ‘whatever’. Do not let that control you. Find your fav song and bust a groove, Stunning Soul!


Ponder Some Truth

There are books, podcasts, articles and content a plenty. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Just ask to be directed in the right direction and go where you feel drawn to go.

If you aren’t sure you can tune into many of my interviews right here on Soundcloud.

And as a student and teacher of A Course In Miracles you may find if the time is right this text may well help shift your perspective deeper than any other. (Just let go of the language it uses and see beyond to its core message that of choosing Love over Fear to lead a Miraculous life). If the entire book is feeling to much try starting your day with this;

“What will you have me do?

Where will you have me go?

What will you have me say?

And to whom?” ~ACIM

Offering yourself to the Universe as a channel of light opens you to service – for self and others. A powerful way to shake up your thoughts and shift your reality from fear to Love.


Make Contact

Phone a beloved friend. Not a friend who will join a pity party and recite the “poor you” mantra. You require a friend who can hold space for you to share then if you are open offer you some guidance toward your truth and champion your light.


Take a Break

Working long hours, pushing yourself; body, mind and heart for long periods of time pays its toll. You know this. You can feel your body when it is exhausted, your mind when it won’t switch off, your heart ‘aching’ for a reprieve and for more love from yourself let alone anyone else. This may mean switching off phone and emails for a period of time, having a sleep in or 2 or 3, going away for a weekend or taking a REAL holiday alone or with your beloved to truly, deeply, recharge and honour yourself first. To fill your own cup so you can come back refreshed and ready to continue.

How do you fill up your own cup first? Check out: Your Best Threesome Ever: Soul, Spirit & Tribe

If you’re pushing the limits and edging burn out I’ve got your covered here too with; The Journey of Feminine Reconnection


Secure Professional Guidance

A mentor, coach, spiritual director who is a neutral space holder and who can come from heart wisdom and Spirit to shine the light on your darkness. Who reminds you of what you really are then leads you to your most empowered self. Back to where you desire most to be – in alignment with the perfection that you are when you choose love over fear and Awaken the Divine Empowerment from Within.


Why So Simple?

Why do these little actions seem so simple and how can they really help?

This is a simple choice, you’re right. A choice that you can make in the click of your fingers. It will happen like that. It just requires you to make that choice over and over again. Every. Single. Day. Come small challenges and grand. This is why it feels “so hard” to start or do it again when you feel “I’ve been here before and I’m over it and had enough”. Because what I’m sharing with you here is a new way of seeing which leads to a new way of experiencing being. That of alignment with your authentic self. Not living by the rules of what any institution, program, person or external power tries to manipulate you to believe is your truth. You are an intelligent soul, you know what I’m referring to just take a look at the newspaper, the morning news and socail media feeds.



It is not any external gratification, relationship, object, accolade or experience that will ultimately awaken the peace of love within you. It comes from you. It comes from Spirit / The Universe / God / Goddess / Divine. This is where you are from, it is where you shall return and it is here that you will tap into your truth, beauty, freedom and love. You are here to rise you are here to shine and you are here to learn that Love is the answer no matter the situation or question.



Rejoice and love yourself today, coz Baby you were born this way.

… I’m on the right track, baby I was born this way

…born to be brave.”

~ Lady Gaga~

Reminding you to shine, be brave and choose LOVE!


With Love, Elise / S*M



  1. Rosie on December 1, 2016 at 8:45 am

    Thanks Stella! Needed this article today x

    • stellamuse on December 3, 2016 at 12:20 am

      Always a pleasure. Smiling from knowing it touched your heart today, Rosie. With Love, Elise / S*M

  2. Lisa Laidley on December 3, 2016 at 4:44 pm

    Thanks for the reminder beautiful Elise x

    • stellamuse on December 5, 2016 at 2:14 am

      Always a pleasure dear Lisa. A little reminder here and there can be a great help to keep us on the path, no matter how stormy it may be. With Love, Elise / S*M

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