When you change your ‘beliefs’ and ‘stories’, you can reawaken your empowerment from within and deepen your truth
Sometimes this calls for you to leave the fiery wants and needs of passion, pleasure and perfect success to search within the darkness of your own shadow; your ego personality, to uncover and confront how you may be holding yourself back from your own empowerment.
What do you feel entitled to?
Deep within yourself I want you to sit with this question. Feel it in your bones and be honest, real and raw. What do I believe I am entitled to?…
For me there was a time I placed a lot of focus on striving to create passion
I wondered how to do it, what was I not “getting” to make this feeling spark and why didn’t I feel it running through my veins and radiating from my being. I wanted more passion in my relationship with my beloved, passion for my vocation – how I serve every day – and passion for my life. Along my journey, I have also studied to be an Archetype Consultant. I learned that these ‘entitlements’ were inspired by the myth I had created – that I was entitled to passion in all areas of my life – which meant I was living from a place of lack. That what was, wasn’t enough. Though it was the belief in entitlement that was the source of my suffering, not the illusion of unrequited passion. This unfulfilled entitlement made me unconsciously punish myself for not ‘feeling it’, I even caught myself punishing my beloved by pulling back and closing up from Love! Because I wasn’t getting what I was ‘entitled’ to, I didn’t celebrate my wins, since they didn’t incite this illusive ‘passion’. What I also didn’t get was that I was the catalyst for my feeling this way.
When I began acknowledging this is of my own creation and then refocusing, instead of being a victim of my own fate, I was able to see I could be a heroine of my own destiny. I dropped the story of what I should have / be / feel and got more real, present and compassionate with myself, beloved and life.
While passion is not off the table, it is not an entitlement for me, it is something that can arise and pass just like other experiences or emotions, but it no longer takes away from my empowerment by me giving into its demanding, expecting nor inciting an inner or outer ‘lack’.
I share this with you to get you thinking. Perhaps passion is one of your entitlements too, or perhaps you have others.
From here I invite you to make a list of your entitlements
Those that are fuelled by the ‘myth’ or story in your mind that has been driving you. Such as I am entitled to; being seen and acknowledged on a bigger platform for all I do. I’m entitled to be taken care of; emotionally, financially, sexually, spiritually. I’m entitled to have money; in my wallet and bank account. I’m entitled to being with an amazing partner and creating a successful, booming career. I’m entitled to have a big home, live near the beach, travel… Or being entitled to a certain outcome such as; validation, appreciation, acknowledgment, emotional support, financial support, love…
Then ask yourself, what am I attached to?
Such as; I’m attached to being heard and seen. I’m attached to being the one to be called not make the first call. I’m attached to being praised for my efforts. I’m attached to everything being taken care of. I’m attached to getting what I want when and how I want it. Knowing whomever else is involved in your attachment and entitlement is only a symbol of what it is playing out within you. This is about you, not your; beloved, colleagues, family or dearest friends, not that ex who keeps coming into your thoughts or life, or the ‘competition’ in your field. You need to step up and take ownership of your attachments not project this onto anyone, no matter what your ‘myth’ or story.
It is these attachments within your story that have you feeling entitled. It is also these attachments to entitlement which have likely caused great downfall or great pain for you. The best part of this journey into your own ego personality / your shadow self, is knowing you have the ability to stop the story it is telling you and consciously choose otherwise. If there is something you are convinced that you are entitled to, something you are locking yourself in -a fate that does not need to be, a fate that is restricting your soul evolution- you are stopping your true nature, your souls purpose, or living your destiny you could say. You fate something when you think you are entitled to a certain outcome, doing this holts Divine intervention and sweeps you up in the story, carrying you away from heart and soul and off your true path.
What may start out as looking like self worth or self love can become entitlement
When you live from a place of believing you are ‘special’, ‘the only’, ‘the best’, that you are ‘unique’ it positions you in a me V’s them, in a binary of superiority which drags along with it entitlement over ‘others’. Be aware of this line and where you sit along it. Take notice of healthy self esteem and self belief, and yes, brand positioning with integrity if this is business – all of this is essential until it changes into an entitlement. You might also want to explore discernment which I wrote about HERE recently.
Instead of entitlement (and suffering) you want to understand your deeper truth
To do this you may like to;
* Get real, be honest and pin point your expectations and beliefs of what you feel entitled to. Then be open to expanding your perception, seeing from a different vantage point. Seeing how if you can shift even one thought/expectation how it may change your story.
*Strengthen self awareness and check in with yourself, especially in areas you feel most challenged then write it out. Starting with something such as; “I’m really challenged by withholding judgment of myself, my beloved and those I work with”. Explore this then put it aside and come back to it in a day or so to reflect and get a better understanding of yourself and what one or two action steps you will commit to moving forward.
*Speak with someone you trust, or a professional coach / guide you can bounce this around with who can offer listening ears and heart, with insight.
*Ask Source / Universe/ the Divine to work through you; “Give me the grace to understand. The clarity to see how I am holding myself back from my truth….”
*Sit in mindfulness and or meditation and concentrate on connecting to your Souls truth / true calling.
*Celebrate the wins you have and the wins of those around you – there need not be competition when you remind yourself you have a path, they have a path and there is ‘enough’ for everyone to succeed and serve, love and enjoy.
*Expand your depths of compassion, loving kindness, non-judgment and humility. In any given moment you can ask yourself; “how can I be more loving etc. right now, in this moment?” I urge you to ask this question often and push through the challenges when they arise.
Nobody is entitled
Yes, your wants and needs, outcomes or things may be nice and may eventuate or manifest in time but your focus is not to live from a place of entitlement to them. Instead your focus is to come from a place of understanding your truth, especially when the sense of entitlement arises. To realise every choice you make is fundamentally a choice to love or come from shadow / fear / ego. Every choice, every thought, every action, where you sit on the bus, the way your respond to a question, the email you write, the way you start your morning, the way you work through a disagreement or awkward conversation … these are all your choices. You then can begin to go from feeling hurt, hard done by or naked and alone when your entitlement prize doesn’t arrive to realising everything is a gift for deeper truth and evolution.
Human experience & possibilities
When you reach this point along your path you are faced with giving up the false permission your myth and stories of entitlement give you to hold someone else accountable for your pain / misfortune / lack. You instead take responsibility for all of that which you can and let the rest be, to unfold as the Grand Plan permits. This is part of your growth here in your human experience. This is deep work. It may be challenging then easy, frustrating then smooth. You may feel you have mastered it then entitlement squirms its way through a tiny crack. When it does, you know what to do. You choose your truth, you choose conscious choices and responsibility, because you know this is the way to walk the path when your story has changed, your power has been reclaimed and you are co-creating a world of unlimited possibilities from your heart, soul and with Spirit.
When you let go of the stories that feed your entitlements you bring in more light and joy; to your self, your dearest ones, and all those you serve. You discover especially that your leadership -in any form it may take- is more inspiring and captivating. As you are now coming from a place of authentic power. You have shifted from entitlement to empowerment with depth of your truth.
What story will you be rewriting today?
Something to Muse on.
With Love, Elise / S*M