Let’s start by saying you are a complete entity, though not an island. No one makes you whole. You.Are.Whole – carving ourselves as we go along, but whole none the less. However, we are designed to connect and share with others, and indeed that is an enormously fulfilling part of our human nature.
But what happens when we’ve been running solo and free for some time and then BAM! Opportunity knocks and They arrive. By They I mean that kindred spirit / soul mate / best friend and lover in one whom you have dreamt about, written about, mused about with your friends … and suddenly it’s no longer just you.
It is exciting and wonderful and, well, it’s a dream come true. BUT it means making space in your Universe and welcoming the new without losing the self you have worked so hard to carve.
6 Stella Tips: How Not To Lose Yourself In A New Relationship:
1# Listen to Your Heart
Turn within and check in, with you. While you will change -as change is inevitable and for our growth- you can stay conscious by noting how you are responding to the changes around you. Make sure you are being your authentic self and not morphing into a shell of yourself and a mini version of your new love.
2# Sustain Your Daily Rituals
If you get up three times a week and go for a 10km run because that is what makes you feel fabulous, then DO IT! Sacred self-practise is soul fuel and keeps you feeling like your brightest version of you. Keeping yourself in shape (mentally, spiritually, emotionally, psychically) puts you in a better position to give of yourself, not give up yourself.
Offer your Love to join in with some of your activities and be open to try theirs. If you’re an avid hot room yogi ask if they want to come to your next class and if they’re hanging out for a hike in the bush or forest; dust off those booties baby, pack a picnic and make a day of it. Who knows, you may unearth some new activates you never knew you loved! And the fact you get to do it together is an awesome bonus!
4# Enjoy Some You Time
I do understand the desire to spend an intense chunk of your life with someone, especially when it’s new, and while Mae West tells us, “too much of a good thing can be wonderful,” so too is You Time. Whether it’s reading a book outside in a hammock, catching up with friends and family, a little self pampering, or meditating alone in blissful silence; from 10 minutes to a day or so, set aside You Time.
5# Be Honest and Speak Up
Communicate openly and honestly how you really feel and listen to your partner when they express their thoughts and feelings. Bear in mind that your choice of words and timing is imperative, as is a caring nature. While challenges arise and compromise is necessary at times, stick to truth. Don’t go along with anything to please someone when it is against your morals, values, intuition or heart.
6# Fear or Love
If you are doubting your own self worth when confronted with the mirror of your new found love, make sure you are choosing LOVE; of your self, of them and of the relationship.
… and a little bonus tip 7# Step by Step
Let the relationship unfold naturally; staying true to you is easier if you’re not diving head first into dark waters. True to you means true to the united two!
Just remember, Loving Kindness, Gratitude and Compassion will sustain in the long run … fuel your relationship with these ingredients and you may very well be onto a winner.
May your mutual love blossom and grow, S*M.
Share with the StellaTribe:
What are your relationship tips?
How do you maintain a healthy, happy balance in your relationship?
…and remember, always kiss goodnight, and good morning, and at 11.11, and at sunset and…