Tantra For the Bedroom and Beyond


Tantra Is More Than Sex Between the Sheets – It’s A Way of Life!

Astrology, astronomy, numerology, medicine, Ayurveda, yoga, philosophy, physiognomy, physics, chemistry, alchemy, mathematics, geometry, psychology … Tantra unifies diverse elements, bringing them together as one.

While Tantra includes lovemaking, essentially it is about LOVE and it is here to learn and weave seamlessly into your daily life!




I was fortunate enough to take a workshop and spend some time with tantric yoga teacher, Emma Power, in magical, magical Ubud.


How would you define Tantra in one sentence?

Tantra is a framework for living life to its fullest, embracing and using the world around us and doing what we do with awareness and consciousness.


What are the main benefits you have received from adopting Tantra as a life practice?

Finding fulfilment. Tantra teaches us how we can live a life that is fulfilling – that gives us both depth and joy. It is also one of the only belief systems that is inclusive of what other systems would call worldly. By practising Tantra we can still enjoy the things in this world. Further more it teaches us how to enjoy these things to the fullest, and to use the gifts of the world to live with more awareness.

Tantra is also an amazing framework. For me, I literally use it as a type of manual for life. When I get struck on a decision or hit a tough time in relationships, I can refer to this awesome system for guidance and support.




What is the highlight of your Tantra workshops?

The feedback we’ve received from participants is that these workshops are ‘life changing’ and ‘mind blowing’.

Essentially, in both the one day and weekend workshop, we’re learning to live life with more fulfilment and depth; sexually, spiritually, in our relationships and in love. The workshops are an incredible opportunity for personal growth in all of these areas. I’d say the highlight of the workshop is that the participants are given access to such powerful, transformational information, in a fun and professional environment.


You have an exciting new workshop just for women; can you tell us a bit about this?

The response from these workshops has been huge! It’s such a fun day, jam packed with great information and lovely ladies. There’s some real magic that happens in the room when these workshops run. It’s so great to see the women who attend learning how they can open into their full potential. This workshop is a must for any woman who has the intuition that there’s more to experience sexually and orgasmically. The teachings give the tools and techniques to become a better lover, to understand the Tantric feminine principles and to open into full sensuality.


While Tantra is all encompassing the concept of ‘harnessing sexual energy and embracing sexuality’ come to mind, what are your thoughts on this?

Yes, Tantra is far more all-encompassing than sex, however sex does stand out as a feature, as Tantra is one of the only spiritual belief systems that celebrates and embraces sexuality. Although other belief systems recognise the power of sexual energy, many of these systems fear and try to suppress sexuality, rather than utilise it.

Sexuality is one of the greatest gifts we’ve been given as human beings. Sexual energy is one of the most potent forces on the planet. When we learn to harness this energy and use it, we are recognising an incredibly powerful tool.




How does Tantra assist in connecting to the Divine / Consciousness / Love?

Tantra gives us both a framework and a language that can help us contextualise our experience of something which is greater than us. On a practical level it gives us many different ways in which we can create a practice. A practice is something we can do on a regular basis to keep us in connection and awareness of Divine / Consciousness / Love. How does this look? Well, the beautiful thing about Tantra is that it is individualised. We tailor our practice to suit the individual. We work out what suits our lifestyle and personality best to help us feel that connection. There are many different ways in which we can create a practice, and the Tantra Is Love Workshops helps us to find the most effective way to discover and maintain that connection.


Can you share with us what a ‘Jade Egg’ is and it’s benefits?

A Jade Egg is a piece of jade stone, which comes in a small egg-like shape. It has a small hole through the narrow end, in which a piece of string is inserted. Jade eggs have been created for women to strengthen the pelvic floor. By inserting the egg into the vagina, the pelvic floor will naturally engage, to keep hold of the egg. Just like a tampon, once the egg is inside, it’s perfectly comfortable. These little eggs have MANY benefits. By strengthening the pelvic floor, we increase the intensity of our orgasm, and also our ability to have many different types of orgasm. By using the jade egg on a regular basis, we start to bring energy, vitality and awareness to the vagina. There are huge benefits also to help with going through labour and the after effects of childbirth, and a strong pelvic floor can give also give a lot of pleasure to your partner. For those of us that don’t have a lot of time to spend on pelvic floor exercises, a big benefit of the egg is that it does the work for you, just by being there! (Jade eggs are available at all workshops)





How do the following key elements connect with Tantra?



Is seen as one of our greatest strengths. A vulnerable state is far more conducive to maximum personal growth and maximum pleasure, than a well-protected state of being.



The deeper we open, the more we feel. The more we feel, the greater we expand.  To stay open – this is the practice. So many of us want to create walls, create closure, protect ourselves. For sure, maybe we wont get as hurt, but we certainly wont feel and experience life as deeply as we can. As a result, we miss out on the fullness and the depth of what life has to offer. And then we wonder why we don’t feel fulfilled.



To live in an authentic state is to live in truth. The reason we are often unauthentic, is because we’re afraid to show our truth, our fear, our vulnerabilities, we’re concerned that we wont be liked. The reality is quite the opposite. If you can live authentically, living in your truth the Universe responds, people respond, life lines up accordingly. Don’t give the Universe mixed signals. You wont achieve and receive what you truly want in this life if you don’t live and express your truth.



Is to go beyond, to expand from our normal state of being. When we experience these states of transcendence, we understand life in a very different way. It’s hard to stay in this state, but it gives us a glimpse, a moment of what is possible. Transcendence comes in many different forms. For some, it will occur whilst being stopped in your tracks at the beauty of a sunset, for others it can be a moment of pure presence in the midst of a meditation. Others will find transcendence in an orgasm that goes beyond the physical body into states of pure ecstasy. In all of these, we have the opportunity to go beyond everyday thinking and experience a tiny taste of enlightenment.



To be present, this is the greatest gift we can offer ourselves and the people around us. I often get asked what my greatest lovemaking tip would be. My answer is always Presence. A person who is present – to their partner, to the moment and to the sensations he/she feels within their own body. This is more important than anything we can do from the perspective of ‘performance’. When we are present, the rest will naturally follow. But this is the first and most important step.



It can work for us or against us. The most important thing is to be aware of it; aware that you are acting out of ego and aware if it is serving you or not serving you. Understand that it is our motivating factor in just about everything that we do. So many people talk about letting go of the ego, detaching from the ego. The reality of this is pretty much impossible in everyday living. So my approach is to befriend my ego, witness it and occasionally laugh at how ridiculous it can be at times.



Breath is such an incredible tool. When we learn to breath properly, we can create expansion in the body. When we create expansion in the body, we create expansion in the mind. Expansion leads us to Transcendence. On a more practical note, breath is one of the keys that we can use to unlock our orgasmic potential. Using the breath in lovemaking is a very powerful tool.



Connection is Relationship – relationship to ourselves, to others, to our environment. These relationships have the potential to be extraordinary.  Tantra provides us with a framework for living which in turn gives us the tools to take the quality of these connections to a whole new level.





What are you thoughts on the following;


David Deida, author of The Enlightened Sex Manual says, “Feel how deeply you want to be loved and give love, and show that with the body.

Our body tells all. How would you hold yourself if your heart was open to love? How does your body language change? What type of energy do we radiate? One of the things I love about the Tantra Is Love Workshops, is seeing participants posture, body language, the way they hold themselves, the way they walk and how this can all change over the course of the weekend.


“It’s the way you show your heart and your sexuality that attracts people.”

Often we go to all sorts of lengths to do what we think is attractive to others. What we don’t realise, is that the best thing we can do is be in our truth. Do the work on yourself, the work to open into your full sexuality and to open your heart, and you will radiate at a magnitude that attracts people into your life like never before.


“The feminine spirit needs to move”

The Tantric term for the feminine Spirit is Shakti. And it is said that Shakti, feminine energy is all that is manifested in this world, all that is She. This feminine energy is often related to things that move – the wind, the ocean, the volcanos, the tornados. Movement is very much a natural state of the feminine.


“Every pleasurable sensation is a mini orgasm”

Agreed. When we start to recognise this concept, we start to understand that orgasm can come in so many different forms. If we can start to take note of these pleasurable sensations, we can start to recognise when we are in an orgasmic state or moment. When we bring attention to these moments, they often expand. These pleasurable sensations are simply a tiny taste of what a bigger orgasm feels like. Pay attention to these and you’ll start to experience and feel so much more. Take time to enjoy the journey, to be present with your body.




How can Tantra assist in sustaining the depth of love through challenges?

Tantra gives us an incredible framework for finding more depth, intimacy and passion in our relationships. When we have this beautiful system set up in our relationships, we are far less likely to experience challenges in our relationships. But all relationships do come with moments of difficulty. Tantra has given us incredible tools that we can work with to assist in moving through the challenges. Not only this, but in Tantra we recognise how to use these more difficult times to then take our relationship to an even deeper level.


What Tantric practices would you encourage the StellaTribe to take on daily?

Regarding Spirituality; Consecration – A power and ancient practice that allows us to find depth, fulfilment and guidance in our daily lives. (Taught in both the Tantra Sexuality and Tantra Relationships Workshop)

Regarding Sexuality; Uddiyana Bandha –  A phenomenal ancient practice, one of the greatest gifts the Tantrics passed down to us. By practicing this technique, men learn to become masters of their ejaculation and both men and women experience longer, fuller, varied and multiple states of orgasm. It’s incredible. (Taught in our Tantra Sexuality workshop)

Regarding Relationships; Transfiguration – A practice that helps maintain the honeymoon period, allowing us to experience and bring back passion, love and intimacy in our relationships (Taught in both the Tantra Sexuality and Tantra Relationships Workshop)

The thing about Tantra and these Tantric Practices is that they don’t take a huge amount of our time. If you practiced all three of these suggestions it may only be 15 – 20 mins out of your day and as a result you’ll see phenomenal transformation in your life. These Tantrics don’t like to muck around!



Artwork by George Atherton Geoglyphiks 


Any specific thoughts on Tantra/Sexuality you would like to share?

It seems that sex is one of the only areas we don’t go to teachers for. Yet its something we experience in our life for most of our life. Many of us don’t give it the attention that it deserves. For example, if you want to learn how to play a guitar, you go to a teacher, you get lessons, you practice, evolve and advance your skills. Our sexuality has the potential to affect everything we do. So it’s something to invest in, explore and use! The Tantrics did the research for us – and then gave us a perfect system to use.


What has been a ‘go to’ Tantra read for you and why?

Anything by David Deida, the guy is a genius. Also Barbarella Carellas is another brilliant Tantra teacher/author.






May you unleash your inner Tantric and bask in the bliss, StellaTribe.

For more Tantric guidance please head HERE or to book a Stella Tantra session connect with me HERE.

With Love, S*M





  1. Bella on October 6, 2014 at 11:52 pm

    Stella, this is one of the best posts I have come across regarding Tantra! Everything said is true and can only be experienced through a ‘sensual experience’ of two souls connecting together. ” Our sexuality has the potential to affect everything we do” – wise and true words! Thank you!!

    • StellaMuse on October 7, 2014 at 9:03 am

      I am so happy to hear you connect with the piece. A Tantric way of life offers so much … may your journey be juicy and Divine, Bella.

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